Perfect Teeth, Loosing 4 kg, and everything else.

Last week, I got my braces. I got my bottom ones first then a few days later I got my top ones put in. I personally hate going to the dentist. I pulled out all of my baby teeth on my own, except one, when my mom forced me to go to the dentist and let the orthodontist pull it out of me. She didn't even give me a shot and I ready started crying my eyes out. I'm scared of needles in my mouth.

Due to terrible past events or occurrences during my childhood, I was left growing up with something called "Tongue Thrust". Where my tongue is just...I can't explain it. Google it.

Due to my Tongue Thrust, the orthodontist put in a barrier that will stop my tongue from pushing my front teeth out.

The first few days, my tongue was confused, swollen, my teeth hurt like hell, and I could barely eat anything solid. So I ended up eating all things squishy and liquid. Which meant; Oatmeal, Soup, Noodles, Yogurt, and Ice Cream.

That is the reason why I lost 4 kg in a such a short period. I could only eat things that are liquid and squishy. It was a pain. I was depressed for the entire week.

But things did turn out okay. I'm used to my braces, and I can see a big change in my teeth just in a week. Soon I'll have the perfect teeth I've been dreaming about.

At the beginning of the month, I was 72kg. I've been 72kg since the beginning for the year, and honestly I didn't think about it. I didn't really think about my weight as much as I did last year, and the year before that. I just let things flow. I went to the gym. I eat how I thought I was eat if I were my perfect weight. And I accepted who I was.

But loosing 4 kg in less than a month. It was just exciting and scary at the same time. After finally accepting that I am now 68kg, I have to be honest and say that I am terrified for gaining weight again. I haven't been 68kg in years. I try to focus on the good things.

Tip: If you've recently lost a lot of weight, and you're terrified to gain all that weight back, think of the good outcomes of it.
 - You look fabulous
 - You're lighter
 - Most clothes fit you perfectly
 - You feel great
 - You feel a lot more confident about yourself and your looks.

That's what I'm trying to focus on.

Everyone says that I've lost a lot. They actually see it - and that is what triggered my fear of gaining weight. But I am going to keep going, and I'm going to push through my fear. This is my body, and I can do what I want with it.

So determined... ahahaha

I'm going to a party later and I'm nervous, excited, and doubting whether I should go or not. But again, I am going to push through my fears and go. I need to get out of my comfort zone and go to a party with out the sister who is always looking out for me. I've decided to be the responsible one and the majorly confident one, and try to be shameless. Like Shameless Maya on youtube

http://www.youtube.com/user/shamelessmaya

Y'all should check her out. She is my inspiration to be confident in myself and to be shameless.

Okay this is getting too long.

My most precious advice I could give anyone, when they're going through hard times or not so hard times is to "Always think about the good things, before & after".

And one more thing I forgot to mention, I've started meditating before I sleep, and it helps me a lot. It calms my mind and my emotions. I keeps me still and really helps. I meditate using the mantra from Eat, Pray, Love "Om Namah Shivaya" which means "I honor the divinity within me". It's a great mantra.

Meditating before bed or in the morning is a great habit. It really helps when you're depressed, angry, scared or stressed. 

Love yourself, Love all!
Thank you!
Have a great day everyone! <3 br="">

A New Year means New Beginnings

I think it's time I should write, it's been a week since the year started.

I started this year off doing nothing. I just finished university on the beginning of December 2012, and since then I've been lost. I haven't really admitted to myself that I've finished university because I haven't thought of what happens next like I usually do.

SO!
For this year, 2013, I am going to do things as they come along. If there is an opportunity that I think I'll enjoy, I'll take it. Whenever my gut tells me I should do something, then I'll do it!

I am going to let things flow like a river this year. YES!
And I encourage you to join me.

If you feel lost with your life and you feel like you have no purpose. Take a deep breath, and count to three. Let everything flow and take its place where its meant to be. 

As for my weight loss. I have not weighed myself since June, and there is a reason to that. I don't have a weighing scale. My aunt took it and I have no idea where it is. So basically, I lost it. ahahahahaha
I need to buy a new one.

I have one thing though, for those of you who are struggling weight. Stop and think of your actions and think "Would I do this if I were thin?". Think of what you would do when you're already thin.

That's all for now!

Love everyone! and Be grateful!
Love you all!
xoxo

The Meaning of Life

For the past week, I've felt completely lost and blank with my life. I started asking questions to myself like;
"Why are we in this world? Why is there life? Why is there the universe? How is all this possible? How is life impossible? What is the purpose of life? Why is it so meaningful?"

and other random questions of why are here, living on this planet in this universe.

I have basically been on auto pilot the entire week, thinking, wondering, cogitating my life and it's purpose. 

On Friday, my cousin came over, and I slightly opened up to her, and told her my thoughts and questions, and she showed me a video that at least explains the meaning of life. 

Here is the video if you want to watch it. Sex, Death and the Meaning of Life

My cousin explained to me that there is no real meaning of life, and that everyone has their own purpose and meaning to life. No one can really explain it's meaning. We even googled it and skimmed through the wikipedia page. Meaning of life.

At the end of everything that I read and watched for about 2 hours or less, and the entire day of trying to sink everything in and understand it. I came up with the conclusion that life has no meaning and that you have to enjoy the beauty of life and what it has to offer. 

I'll be finishing university on December at the age of 18. This seems another big leap in my life and I think this is the reason that made me think twice of the existence of entire universe and everything inside and around it. 

I still seem a bit lost and black and my brain is probably still on auto pilot. But, we just all have to face life head on and enjoy it. Enjoy what it has to offer, because who knows, we'll maybe only get one life. Or as most people say these days that really annoy the hell out of me "You only live once (YOLO)"

I fucking hate that line because it became so annoyingly mainstream. But it speaks that truth. You may only live once or you may be resurrected or something.  

You just have accept the life you have and enjoy the wonders of everything it presents, because to be completely honest, there is absolutely nothing you can do about it; besides kill yourself. 

The meaning of life is the most unanswered questions in the entire universe; in my opinion. Life is just there, without any explanation, it just exists and no one knows why. It is up to you what you do with yours. 

I am going to make the best of it. Starting with finishing university with honors. From there I'll have to decide what to do next. 

Imperfection

Good day my lovely readers.
I give my apologies for not blogging since new years. I've been trying to figure out what exactly to write about for the past 3 months, and now I know.

"IMPERFECTION"

I myself have a slight obsessive compulsive disorder, but not with things around me, but with myself. Everything that comes to me have to be perfect. My body, my man, my career choice. They have to be perfect. Everything has to fit perfectly into my life.

Most people say "Nobody is perfect". Whenever they say that to me, the first thing that pops in my head is, "pfft...anyone can be perfect" What I mean by that is anyone can be perfect in their own ways. Its like how you have your tea, some prefer it with more sugar, and its perfect, some prefer it with more milk, and its perfect.

Ever since I found that I could get things with the Law of Attraction, I realize that I could get PERFECTION. As most of you know that I've been on my weight loss journey since 2010, and since then I've made multiple deadlines throughout the years in which I would be come my ideal weight and have my ideal body. When I would reach my deadline, my weight would either still be the same, lessen or increase. I didn't have my ideal body nor was I my ideal weight.

This year 2012, I've made another deadline, March 14th 2012. In Japan is White Day. White Day is when a boy returns his love to the girl he likes by giving them chocolates, this event only happens in Japan. Its such a sweet event.

The reason why I chose this date is, well, I don't really know. I just chose it, thinking that it would mean something special to me.

As the day passed, I checked my weight, I hoped that I would at least loose a few kg's but instead I gained 2kg's. How depressing. I went like "Wtf am I doing wrong?"(excuse my language). I took a few minutes to stop and think of my actions so far, I said to myself "what is it? I must be doing something wrong. Think all over again" 

So I thought all over again, from the very beginning. I asked myself "What would I do in my ideal weight? How would I be like? How will my life be? How will I act?"

Last year, I had written on my ideal body vision board "To have an easy time finding the right size of clothes for me", "To go shopping", "To say thank you everyday", "to feel confident and comfy wherever I go"

I noticed that when I reread what I had written last year, To the universe, I already am my ideal weight and already have my ideal body. Now I realized that I am not doing anything wrong. I'm doing what I had written a year ago. What I wanted to be, and I am where I wanted to be a year ago.
I've changed the way I see myself in my ideal body. My sense of style has changed, my sense of thought has changed. The way I see perfection in my life has changed. I've grown.

When things like this happens in life, things that don't work out, things that disappoints you. Stop. Relax. Think of what you initially wanted. How it all fits in.

Here is a tip: When you want something, write it down. If you don't want anyone to see it, write it down in a notebook or a small paper, and keep it hidden, and hopefully you'll remember where you kept it. Reread what you had written a month later, and see how you feel about it.

♥...Love all...♥

It depends

I just want to say I'm so sorry to all my readers, since i haven't been posting as often as i should.

I have no excuse except writers block.

I've actually been wanting to update and post but I can't think of anything to post about my journey.

well here is the update

There is progress with my perfect body.
Everything is going swell.
But I'm not loosing that much.
well, I'm not loosing at all.

here is a tip: If you feel bad about something you're doing, don't do it. STOP. and do something that makes you feel marvelous.

Since its my summer break for about a month, I have time.
Everyone might say, "Its her summer break, she's going to exercise, go on a diet, fast since its Ramadan"
No

In my perfect body, I would only go jogging occasionally, or when i feel like it
[Note the word "Feel Like It", let me rephrase that, "Like the feeling of it", this means Inspiration, Excitement. I feel I want to go jogging because I like the feeling of it AT TIMES]

I take jogging as a hobby, as i take dancing
I don't dance ALL the time do I?
~

I don't go on diets.
I get completely insulted if someone says I'm on a diet.
Let me define my meaning of Dieting
Dieting - taking note of how many calories, fat, carbohydrates, etc taken in a day.
- exercising unwillingly
- Starvation
~

Since its Ramadan.
I only fasted once this Ramadan, as I did last Ramadan.
I lasted, but on the process, I felt terrible.
Head Ache
Nausea
but i wasn't hungry (note: I'm talking about myself)

Gandma says "Nada fast to loose weight"
she suddenly says that so me and how do I react?
I get freaked out.
In my head "I don't feel like it"
That maybe some one else 's excuse aswell

The feeling when doing things is really important
ex. Your friends say "take money from your moms purse and we can go buy you a dress"
how would you feel?
Bad, obviously
You must ask yourself "What would I feel after I do this?"
you'll know

I don't feel like fasting because I'm pmsing and your not suppose to fast when your pmsing,
and because I dont like the feeling of stuffing my face at the end of the day.

Feelings are Important when making decisions and doing new things.
but you must always remember to think of the after, not that now.

My perfect body
I shall keep on going.
No deadline.
why?
because I already have it.

Thank You for reading this ^.^

Hope You have a great day!

Keep on Going

The reasons why we some times fail when trying to get the things we want is because of our emotions.
These emotions come from the things you do and think of.
Remember that what ever comes to you, you've attracted.
it doesnt matter if its a cat, dog or a fly. you've attracted it.

I know that you want many things. I want many things too.
one of which is to loose weight.

I saw my weight on January and it was the same as now.
nothing has changed.
now that....that just brings me down even more.
Its already been 6 months.
and absolutely nothing has happened.

but then. i found a way. Something that i haven't been doing for the past 6 months of trying to loose weight.
is to ACT!

act is one of the major ways to get what you want. ACT!
act as it if you already have it...

So what I'm doing on my weight loss...
I'm not going to start again, and I'm not going to end.
I'm just going to keep on Going. no matter what happens i will keep on going until i reach my goal. Even though i feel as if its not working, I'll keep in mind that if one person can do it with nothing then I want to be that person who does it. I want to tell everyone my weight loss journey, on how I just went on with my life and lost all I needed to loose.

I watch the nanny. Fran.
She has marvelous curly hair, great hips, and she is left handed.
I have curly hair that im still on the edge of figure it out. I have hips, and curves, and I'm left handed.
I take some of her aspects to create my perfect life.

A PERFECT BODY MEANS A PERFECT LIFE

I also use to watch Ugly Betty
Betty. She has frizzy hair, glasses and braces.
I have slightly fixed the frizzy-ness of my hair, i have glasses but i'm not going to get braces.
At the end of the show. Betty turned from an Ugly ducking into a Swan.
Betty got thinner, took off her braces, and got new glasses. I was so proud of her.
I want to be like her.
She looked good and became very successful as the co-founder of a magazine in London.

FROM AN UGLY DUCKING TO A SWAN

I started acting as how i would act if i was in my perfect body.
> I walk differently. I walk as how naturally thin people walk. Straight and Confident.

> I eat differently. I only eat when im hungry and stop when im slightly full. I never get stuffed because it makes me feel bad. ( i hate being stuffed sometimes, i feel terrible )

> The way i look at myself. I get up in the morning saying Thank you. and look at myself in the mirror. I can not believe it but i look good when i wake up in the morning. My hair might be tangled but it looks good. its not big and bulky like before. My body looks marvelous. and then I smile at myself in the mirror, saying THANK YOU!

> The way i put my clothes on. I have a REALLY THIN sister. so i know how thin people put clothes on. I put it on like a naturally thin person. My pants, my pants is always the problem. I'm a size 34, but it still seems tight around the thigh area. but i make it work by telling myself that its always too big on me. It might be lying to yourself but it will become true. The way i wear my pants isnt above my stomach anymore. Its below. I've noticed that naturally thin people do not wear their jeans about their stomach, they wear it below. So i started wearing it below my belly, to show off how much fat i have on it. I might sometimes feel very cautious, but then gain up confidence, and say to myself "Say all you want, this is my body, and i'll get more out it then you will xD"

No matter what it is. not matter how many times you fail.
Just keep on going, because you wont regret it.

Think of your perfect life,
then live it...

I also suggest reading "Remember Me? by Sophie Kinsella"
this is one book that really inspired me. and its hilarious too
4thumbs up because i only have 4 thumbs.! xD

You will have your way!